Tag Archives: Ways
Stress is what you feel when you have to handle more than you are used to. When you are stressed, your body responds as though you are in danger. It makes hormones that speed up your heart, make you breathe faster, and give you a burst of energy. This is called the fight-or-flight stress response.
Stress is part of life. Life itself bring certain challenges inherent requirement for the mind, body and emotions, and that we must try to overcome (overcome). People can adapt to stress, and use it to their advantage, but when the stress is overwhelming, can affect the quality of life of people.
Here comes the 17 tips to help you deal with stress.
We all worry at times, and there is probably no way to stop worrying forever. There are some specific ways to stop right now, however. The following tips on how to stop worrying come from experience, because I’ve always been a bit of a worrier, and I had to learn some good techniques for stopping this energy-sucking habit. Here are five of the best.
1. Take action now. Any action towards a goal tends to diminish worry. Thinking too much about your goals or plans, especially if you dwell on the hurdles, will cause you worry and stress. Of course you should plan well, but when planning drifts towards worrying, it’s time to start doing something positive. Take action!
2. Make decisive decisions. When you want to stop worrying too much about an unresolved issues, you need to make decisive decisions, and even bad decisions may be better than doing nothing. Often you will immediately resolve the stress when you, for example, finally decide to quit that job, buy that house, or make that phone call. Nothing crowds and clouds your mind with worry as much as decisions waiting to be made. Make them now, or at least start gathering the information you need to make them. If they prove to be bad decisions, just make new ones.
3. Use mental categories. Too many things going on in your head? Put them on lists and you may feel better. It works well for many of us worriers. When you are dwelling too much on something, and you stop to schedule a time to work on it, or just put it on a list, it is easier to let go of it for now. Jot down that phone call you have to make on tomorrow’s list, and you’ll feel less worried now. You’re basically creating “mental categories.” In fact, just saying to yourself, “There’s nothing I can do about this until Monday,” can put a worry into a category of “nothing to worry about right now.”
4. Deal with problems directly and quickly. To eliminate worry when there are real problems, try to confront them head-on, and resolve them quickly. I once had to sue someone over a business matter, and I was worrying about it for weeks. When I finally just filed the papers, got on the phone, and came to an agreement, my stress was gone. Actually, my worrying began to dissipated as soon as I started acting, BEFORE the resolution (See #1).
There is more mental pain and worry in anticipating problems than in the problems themselves. If you lost a thousand dollars in the stock market last year, you probably suffer less from that today than you would from wondering if you’ll make it on time to a concert you paid $50 for. The anticipation of problems is what causes the most worry. Just deal with them head on as soon as is possible, and resolve them to the extent possible.
5. Meditate to eliminate worry. Meditating is a great way to relax and to stop worrying, but what if you don’t have the time for more involved meditative practices? Don’t worry. Just try this: close your eyes, let the tension out of your body and take several deep breaths through your nose. That’s it. Want even easier meditation? Try brain wave entrainment CDs that do all the work for you. Just pop on the headphones and they’ll relax you by slowing your brain waves.
Try the above techniques. Make habits out of whichever ones work best to stop your worries. They need to be habits because nothing works if you forget to use it. In fact, until they become habitual, you may want to carry a list of your favorite techniques for eliminating worry.
“Never go to sleep without a request to your subconscious.” – Thomas Edison
Your subconscious loves to do work while your body performs other tasks that are easy. I can prove this very easily by asking you how many good ideas you have had while driving or in the shower. When you are relaxed yet slightly distracted, your mind is often at its best.
Using subconscious requests will…
- Improve your motivation.
- Help you become happier.
- Increase your emotional intelligence.
You’ll see improvement in less than a month.
My last request was…
“Please give me more patience when commuting to work and allow me to even enjoy my time in the car.”
Within a month I was enjoying my ride to work.
My latest request is…
“Let’s find creative ways to grow my blog.”
I took this approach because it’s going to take a request to my subconscious and action in my waking life to make this happen. This request is only a few days old, but it’s already working. Instead of just asking people to help vote for my blog on social sites that rate articles such as Stumble Upon and Digg, I’ve change my communication. I now friend someone, give a compliment (only if they are worthy) and tell them that they ever need any help to shoot me a message. They are much more willing to help me out.
My mindset is changing by setting my subconscious on a certain issue. I start to see new angles that I’ve never seen before. This subconscious request works for personal issues as well as work related concerns.
The 3 step request only takes five minutes:
Step 1: Before you turn out the light, close your eyes and take one minute to make a request to your subconscious. It can be anything. I would start small and make it open ended. I wouldn’t request to be an astronaut by the end of the month. Your subconscious is good, but not that good.
Step 2: Take two minutes to visualize yourself actually able to do this thing. Whether it is getting the motivation to jog before work or eating a healthy snack, you must visualize yourself doing the request that you asked your subconscious. Let’s say you want to jog before work: imagine yourself getting up a few minutes earlier than usual, putting on your exercise clothes and jogging shoes, and heading out into the crisp air. Then you start jogging, watching the sun rise over the buildings, the birds chirping, and you are feeling good.
Step 3: Take two minutes to imagine the feeling that will occur when you are able to accomplish this new thing. How do you feel when you walk back in your front door after a morning jog? Energized? Whatever feeling you want to achieves imagine that you have already created this emotion inside of yourself. Let it sink in, then go to sleep and let your subconscious do the rest of the work.
Your subconscious mind wants to help you improve your life; you just have to trust its vast resources and allow it to do its thing.
Everyone has a message. Everyone wants to be more persuasive. Whether you are an employee working for someone else, an owner of your own business, a student, a blogger, etc. you need to be heard. In that sense we are all marketers. The world is drowning in information and when you speak you need to make sure your message gets results.
The following are 10 ways to be more persuasive. They are all proven effective in controlled experiments.
- Social Proof – When the course of action is not clear, people look to others for guidance (even though they will deny that fact). Put more simply, people tend to do what other people similar to them do. This behavior is programmed into our genes and is well established. Social proof is more influential when we areobserving others we perceive to be similar to us. So if you are trying to sell someone on something, be it an idea or a product, a powerful method is to show how others like them have already bought into it.
- Mirroring – People respect, like, and are most easily influenced by people who they perceive to be similar to themselves (see Social Proof above). So one way to influence someone is to mirror them. Mirror their speech and their actions. If you verbalize back to someone something they have said and in the same words, you instantly become more influential. The same thing applies to posture and actions. If you want to influence Mike, then you need to act like Mike. If he is leaning back in his chair, then you would be wise to do the same.
- Offer Few Choices – People are paralyzed by choice and if given too many options, will simply fail to choose anything. So if you are offering up alternative products, services, or ideas, be sure to limit the choices to only a few. Two choices is often better than three.
- Reciprocation – Do someone a favor and they are more likely to return it. There is an interesting twist to this. People who do you a favor once are more likely do do you another favor in the future. Once someone has done you a favor, in their mind you become more important to them; you must be worthy of their time. So get someone to do you a small favor, and they are more likely to listen to you or do you an even bigger favor in the future. The best way to get them to do you a favor in the first place is to do one for them.
- Baby Steps – We want to act consistent with our previous actions. Further once we buy into something or someone, we tend to become much more committed to it or them. This is the foot-in-the-door technique. No matter how small a step you can get someone to take as far as agreeing with your idea, product, or service, those small steps will lead to larger steps in the future. This even works on yourself. Start small. Get your target to say yes to anything first, and then they will be much more likely say yes to what your really after.
- Labeling – Marketers use this one on you all the time: “You seem like a smart person and smart people buy X”. Tell someone they are smart, sophisticated, thrifty, a risk-taker, etc. and ask them to take an action consistent with that label. There is a powerful inner drive to stay consistent with what we have demonstrated in the past. If someone labels us, we believe we have demonstrated that trait (especially if it is positive).
- Ask the Right Question – Recently I was given a pitch for a timeshare. All throughout the pitch, the agent was asking me and my wife questions about what would we do or what we would like to do. This was leading to the final push on the actual sale. Before asking someone to do something, get them to say they would do it or something consistent with it. Get them to verbally express an inclination or desire to do something. Then when asked to do something consistent with what they have previously expressed, they are much more likely to agree.
- Smile – Smiles are powerful influencers. People like people who smile. But your smile needs to be authentic. Humans have a remarkable ability to detect false smiles (it’s all in the eyes). So find something in the other person that you can authentically appreciate and then smile about it. In general, just practice looking on the bright side of things and being happy. You will naturally smile more and thus be more influential.
- Keep it Simple – I once read that studies showed the most persuasive writing was written at an 8th grade level of comprehension. This is true even among people who were capable of comprehending much more complex language. There is a convergence of data showing that simple is better. Simple and easy to remember names and ideas are the best. Resist the urge to show off your knowledge and sophistication and instead K.I.S.S. (Keep It Simple Stupid).
- Scarcity and Exclusivity – Making whatever you are offering, including ideas, unique and thus scarce is a very effective technique. People love and value what is scarce. Think about a high-end Mercedes sedan. Part of what makes it so desirable is the fact that it is rare; the overwhelming majority of people cannot afford it. At first glance scarcity might seem to be counter to the social proof phenomenon described above, but in reality they go together. When you buy the high-end Mercedes, you are joining and exclusive club of rich and sophisticated people who also value such quality and sophistication in an automobile. They are people like you. Mac owners are a small minority of computer owners, but they also believe they are a group of exclusive and sophisticated computer users. They know better. So offer something unique, but package it in a way that when people buy into it, they also are attracted by the social proof of others.