Tag Archives: Humour
- I don’t deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don’t deserve that either. (Jack Benny)
- If it weren’t for my lawyer, I’d still be in prison. It went a lot faster with two people digging. (Joe Martin)
- Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. (Ambrose Bierce)
- The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. (Calvin Trillin)
- Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. (Sam Levenson)
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me. (Noel Coward)
- The difference between death and taxes is death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets. (Will Rogers)
- You know you’re getting old when you stop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there. (George Burns)
